ORAL SEX: WHAT WOMEN LIKE

I've had my share of conversations with women regarding how they prefer their reception of oral sex and although I cannot speak for all women, this article will certainly be speaking for most. If you've always wanted to know how you're doing in the "cunning linguist" department, today's your lucky day. I know it's difficult when your partner doesn't let you in on what you're doing right or wrong. It sometimes feels as though you're venturing into a shady area where you don't have a clue as to what your partner might be feeling. But not to worry gentlemen, I am here to help you further your mastery of the mystery that is the vagina. If you've ever asked yourself the following questions, here I am to answer them for you.

how important is oral sex?

As I've informed readers over and over again, all women are different and so the level of importance regarding cunnilingus differs as well. But from what most women tell me, oral sex, if done right, becomes a very important aspect of sexual encounters. How do you feel about fellatio? That's what I thought. But if your woman bit and chewed your penis every time she went down on you, you wouldn't be too thrilled about her mutilating your penis whenever she decided to give you your "treat," now would you? The same applies for women; if you're horrible at it, she may decide that oral sex isn't that important, especially if you're great in other venues. But if you're the master of her castor, then she'll be coming round the mountain when she comes. Most of the women I ask about cunnilingus get this weird, elated look on their faces just before they let out a sigh and say, "oh, it's very important." There's nothing quite like the feel of a warm, wet tongue against the vulva, I always say.

is oral better than sex?

Now there's a question that's difficult to get a handle on. Most women would say that both elements of sex are important, but then again, many women say that they only reach orgasm via oral sex. But the combination of both oral sex and intercourse is definitely awesome. A lot of women reveal that the penis is a pretty straightforward tool, but the tongue can manipulate the vagina and the clitoris in a variety of ways. Think about it; our vaginas have holes with which you can insert your penis rhythmically -- our mouths are holes as well, yes, but there's that tongue attached to it and the tongue can manipulate your penis in ways you never imagined. You do the math. And depending on the performer, oral sex can leave a woman weak and shaking. And if you're the type of guy who throws his fingers into the mix, then chances are you're the master of her domain. So what do women like when guys go down on them?

what do women like?

So how can you perform oral sex in a way that'll make her toes curl and have her digging her nails into the bed? That's easy:

Tease first: Don't just head straight for the vagina. Tease your woman by kissing the inside of her thighs, her hips and her belly button. Let your tongue brush up against the vaginal area, but don't start licking and sucking right away. Give her time to get wet and make her beg if you have the stamina.

Enjoy yourself: If you're having a good time down there, it will help her feel comfortable about your being there. Most women are somewhat neurotic about smelling and tasting good so if you love it down there, she'll know you enjoy the flavor.

Move slowly: Spending more than 30 seconds down there is also nice. Taking your sweet time to inhale the bouquet and taste every section of the vagina is appreciated.

Stimulate the clitoris: Licking and lightly sucking the clitoris and its hood are much appreciated since the area rarely receives attention amid intercourse. As well, many women achieve clitoral orgasm much more easily than they do vaginal or G-spot ones.

Penetrate with tongue: There's nothing quite like the feeling of a hardened tongue penetrating the throbbing lips of a woman (you know which ones I'm talking about). Take your time and explore the entire area with your mouth.

Massage the outer lips: While you're using your tongue to suck and lick her vulva and clitoris, use your thumbs to massage her outer lips, pulling them apart and pushing them together gently. This will drive her crazy.

Use your fingers: If you can gently suck on her clitoris for a while and then use your fingers to penetrate her, chances are her legs will start trembling. Before long, she'll be begging for a piece of your penis. As well, you can simultaneously massage her clitoris with your fingers while your mouth is sucking on it.

Use a pillow: Place a pillow under her butt so that her vagina is in a position where you can easily enjoy your meal.

Massage her nipples: Many women enjoy having their nipples stimulated. So while your mouth is busy down there, use your fingers to massage her nipples and caress her breasts.

Say something: Hearing a man moan while he's eating his woman lets her know that he loves what he's doing. Saying something like, "I've been dying to taste you all day" or "you taste so good" will only make her more comfortable and prepared to show you the big O.

Suck, then penetrate: To stop in the middle of intercourse to taste her is a grand turnon. Every now and then, stop the penetration to go down on her. You'll shock her with pleasure.

Use mints: Whether it's a "curiously strong mint" or a Halls cough drop, menthol can work wonders and enhance the sexual experience like you wouldn't believe. And when you're done, you can let her try it out on you.

Hummer: Okay, not every woman loves this, but many do. When you place your lips over her clitoris, hum lightly -- you'll know instantly if she's enjoying it. And of course, there is an abundance of things you should avoid doing at all costs...

what should you avoid?

And as always, there are certain actions you should steer clear of at all costs.

Bad reaction: Saying things like "man, you smell!" or "did you shower today?" are not recommended. Not only will she feel bad, she'll lose that sexual mood.

Don't insist: If she's not fresh, don't insist on going downtown on her. Most women prefer being freshly showered before they let their men venture down there. Respect that, even if you have a thing for stronger odors.

Keep nails trim: Make sure your nails are trim and your hands are clean. The vagina is a very sensitive area so be cautious.

Don't go faster: Women's biggest complaint by far begins once they get very sexually aroused by what you're doing. Men take their moaning as a signal that they should move their mouth and tongue as fast as humanly possible. This only serves to make your woman numb. If she moans, keep up the same tempo unless she indicates otherwise.

It's not a lollipop: When you lick her clitoris, don't look up at her with every swipe as if to ask, "Was that okay?" Practice, take your time and enjoy your moment of intimacy with her vagina. You'll know when she's enjoying it.

No enthusiasm: If your girlfriend performed fellatio with no fervor and even gagged on occasion, you wouldn't enjoy it. Show some enthusiasm when you're down there.

No limits: You don't have to restrict yourself to the clitoris and vulva; relish the vagina in its entirety. And if you and she are the bold types, you can explore her backside with your tongue and/or fingers as well.

Don't blow air inside her: Believe it or not, blowing air directly into the vulva can seriously harm a woman. Do not, under any circumstances, do it.

Bargaining chip: "I went down on you, now you have to go down on me." Come on guys, you have to acquire a taste for your woman's genitals. Learn to love and enjoy the area without keeping a mental scorecard.

But my ex liked this: Like I already mentioned, all women are different. So if you go down on a new partner, assume that she might not like what your last woman did. Start out slow, that's your safest bet.

practice makes perfect

Enjoying the taste and aroma of your woman should be a given. Couples should try to experience everything together when it comes to lovemaking. Don't limit yourself; expose yourself to the acts you're somewhat apprehensive about, namely oral sex. If you want to be an amazing lover, then you need to take on her vagina with more than just your penis. Take the time to learn about her body and enjoy it slowly. Then you can give her what you want, one inch at a time. Oh and always play it safe.